The Diary
by YourFlawedDesign
Summary: Small Kingdom Hearts collaboration between myself and PaintedxDreams to help get back into the characters. Just some little fluffy RiSor thing that got a lot of attention on dA.
1. Since You

**Since You've Returned:**

_Fandom:__ Kingdom Hearts II_

_Character:__ Sora_

I honestly didn't know what to do. In a single night I had lost my two best friends.

I pushed forward- I really did! But... I felt so scared.

You know I cared about you, didn't you? About both of you! How could I have known the girl I was so sure I loved would disappear? That my best friend would turn his back on me!?

I made more friends, and I traveled to so many worlds that I was overwhelmed! I was just a kid- so why did I have to save the worlds?

I didn't remember that man from when we were children until recently but... It makes sense now.

I learned so much, looking for you two. I _was_ looking for both of you, you know! I wanted you both back... so badly... and when I found you...

There's like a whole year missing from my memory after that horrifying meeting!

I don't know how it happened. I don't understand completely, but I was asleep for so long...

Then it was like all my previous work of saving the worlds been meaningless! This 'Organization', this 'Kingdom Hearts'...

I had to _kill_ people... over and over again... And people committed suicide to save me! To save 'Roxas...' I still have nightmares!

I finally, I _finally_ had gotten you both back...!

I'd never say it to her face, but Kairi isn't that great with a keyblade... Honestly, when I saw her again I was so happy, but I realized... I didn't _love_ her. I do, but... not the same as I though before.

But Riku, when I got _you_ back... When I saw you again... Oh Riku, I don't know how I could ever express so much joy and happiness... My entire being just felt _so alive_.

I didn't care what you looked like or anything, I knew it was you! I knew you were better- you were safe and you were _my_ Riku again!

...Riku... since we were alone - and you were 'yourself' again - back on that island, somewhere far away...

I've realized something...

Riku, I really care about you.

I don't know what I'd do if I really lost you again.

Kairi, Goofy, Donald, King Mickey... They're all my great friends... But Riku ever since we've returned to Destiny Islands, I've been so... I've been thinking a lot.

Even since that letter came, I've known _something_ is going to happen - soon too. We may not see each for awhile - or maybe something great will happen this time...!

So... while we're here...

"He-Hey Riku?"

Riku... I believe...

"D-Don't be mad..."

I'm afraid I'm going to ruin you coming back home...

"Promise... you won't hate me...?"

Riku... I'm too scared!

"It's important..."

I think I love you.

**AN: ** So, this was my first attempt at Sora after _years_ of not writing from his point of view. Some of you are like 'What about _Music in Me_ or _Suicide is Painless_?'. This was written back in May, a month before chapter one of _Music in Me_ was finally finished, and was submitted in March the same day as the first chapter of _Suicide is Painless_, the non-character chapter. I didn't put it up on Deviant Art for so long because I was getting back into character. Hopefully a collab piece for Riku will be posted tonight.


	2. Meeting You Again

**Since You've Returned:**

_Fandom:__ Kingdom Hearts II_

_Character:__ Riku_

"Once we step through, we might not be able to come back. We may never see our parents again. There's no turning back. But this may be our only chance. We can't let fear stop us! I'm not afraid of the darkness!"

…when I think back to the day I screamed those words into the howling wind rippling around us, I wonder if you could see the fear in my eyes. I didn't want you to see it, I didn't even want to—but it was there.

It started out so innocent, a small dream to sail from the islands and see the worlds beyond…what it ended up being was an insatiable lust for power that took me down the darkened path.

Looking back at it now…Kairi was my justification; my one alibi when questioned of my intentions. I was feeding off the darkness, and as long as Kairi was unconscious she was my reason for doing so. I wasn't ready to take responsibility, to admit that I was using the darkness to cover up the insecurities.

I wanted to get her heart back, I really truly did. But even more than that I didn't want you to know what my actions had done to her, the slaughtering that had happened because of my own two hands.

I didn't think that you'd follow me.

Honestly, it never occurred that you possibly could.

…I was angry, watching you from the distance. You had Donald, Goofy, friends wherever you appeared, and the power of light. I had jealously, rage, a lost soul and a darkened heart. It felt like every time we ran into each other I heard 'Kairi, Kairi, where is she? What have you done? What happened to her?' I told you I had the situation handled; couldn't you just listen to me?

It was best that you didn't. I know that now.

Something just boiled my blood every time you called her name or reached past me to get her. It was like I could feel the wounds in my heart seeping deeper, making me back further and further away.

It didn't feel like you were trying to find me, I didn't even believe that you wanted to.

You lost consciousness, and part of you went missing. Seeing you laying there sealed away was the most painful thing I have ever felt in my life, and knowing that there was nothing I could do to bring you back to me…resurrect the way things were. King Mickey told me that this pain I felt in my heart was 'pure', and could be a step towards the redemption of my heart.

I began my mission, donning a black cloak and a blindfold; I set out with the King as my guide into the unknown. I promised that this time I would finish something that I started.

The next time we ended up meeting, I was half the man I had been and something completely new all at once, but I was not the type that I wanted you to see. I wasn't ready, it didn't feel real.

…since when could Kairi fight? With her own _keyblade_ of all things? …I'd be lying if I said I wasn't proud. I really am, of both of you.

You're finally awake, I knew you had woken up…but hearing and seeing are two separate things. You look so much better than you had back when you were sealed up. Stronger, taller, and so very _alive... _can you hear how my heart picked up its beats? It feels…warmer in my chest, even though breathing has gotten a little harder.

Since when has another person been able to control my heart?

The sun is setting now and the wind that rolls off the coast is cool. Here you are beside me, and silence seems to be the third wheel rolling alongside us.

We are alone, and I haven't felt this at peace in ages. I cannot help but notice however, you shifting nervously from side to side.

The letter has arrived on the shore, and I was almost tempted to toss it back to the mercy of the waves. It wasn't for me, that much I knew to be true. This seems to have unsettled you even more, and your fingers are trembling as the cork comes loose out of the mouth of the bottle.

_"He-Hey Riku?" _

"What is it?"

_ "D-Don't be mad..."_

"I don't think I could be."

_ "Promise... you won't hate me...?"_  
"I promise."

What are you waiting for?

_"It's important..."_  
"So spit it out."

You're starting to scare me.  
Are you that terrified of who I've become?

This feels like the beginning of the end, or perhaps it's the end to an all new beginning.

**AN: ** This was the response to PaintedxDreams, she wanted me to post it here instead of on her account, but that's okay because it sort of completes the story.


End file.
